When you cry, I hold you. When your scared, I hold you. When you don't know where your life is going, I hold you. When everything goes to shit, I hold you. And try to make it better.
It isn't better, is it?
Cry for me, my crocadile teared love. Cry for me and press my buttons. Each button serves a function. Each button has a purpose. Each circuit yields results.
Using a machine doesn't mean you understand it.
I don't want to be used, I want to be understood.
This is a page created by a bloke that we rarely see around here anymore.
quite a shame.
check out his writing..
(warning: contents may induce tongue swallowing and inflict permanent emotional trauma.)
--126.96.36.199 20:46, 4 Mar 2005 (CET) Slight return
Just some old stuff I originally posted on KunDa's page. Wanted to give it a proper burial.
Sweetmorn, Discord 23, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3170
Frood's snooping around on google specials --
- The complete works of the late Douglas Adams in .txt or .zip format.
- A collection of ebooks (.txt) the most notable of which are the Dune series by Frank Herbert.
If only I could find more of Herbert's works online. When you get a chance read "The Whipping Star" and "The Dosadi Experiment"
>I plan to.
Sweetmorn, Discord 23, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3170
Frood's random commentary in the second degree
"Thoughts on computer repair"
I fix computers for a living. I try to fix people as a hobby. contrary to the beliefe of my customers fixing computers invovles very little "Ninja Magia" or "l33t Skillz" or other such garbage notions. Fixing computers requires a good foundation of knowledge and an affinity for logic. fixing computers is easy if you posses common sense. Most people hate computers and technology in general.
"We just want it to work" or "I don't care how you do it, just make it work"
The mentality which lets people demand that something perfrom a function for them without knowing or even wanting to know how it functions on the most basic of levels portends the end of the world to me. I'll avoid the apocalyptical machine vs. man mythos for now. (I'm with Herbert on that one, heavily computerized society does not become controlled by computers, it becomes controlled by the people who controll the computers. Butlerian Jihad ensues.) The thing that bothers me about this attitude is that it does not limit itself to technology, but to everything with whose function you cannot be bothered. How can you trust something you don't have the slightest interest in understanding? how can you make demands on a system to function without understanding how it functions?
I've voiced this opinion with several of my peers and they have all brushed me off with a "People cant know everything" or words to that effect. I dont buy it, How can people be responsible for their actions if they don't know what they are doing? how can you trust a person with access to YOUR confidential information if they are a bunch of blithering idiots who havent the slightest inkling of what they are doing? News stories keep talking about "Hackers" and portraying those technically savvy as some kind of cyber ninjas who sneak past your systems defenses like terrorists at an airport. Again, I don't buy it. anyone knows that you don't have to break the door down if its not locked, the easiest way past a chain of defense is its weakest link, crack that link and everything else falls apart.
Banks sending out mass e-mails with ALL their clients e-mail addresses in the "To:" line. School/College/corporate employees making confidential data available simply because they do not know how to save things to a proper location. Government agencies failing security audits.
It's all one big clusterfuck of disknowledge. I'd like to coin that term right now. Disknowledge - <...> (I've tried to come up with a good definition but unfortunately my linguistic compression mechanism is at a lapse. contribute if you like)
The problem is not limited to technology. People don't even want to know or understand how their own bodies work. western medicine/marketing obscures the conception of bodily functions and physical health to the point of corporate shamanism. "Take This pill, Take that pill, take this one for the side effects of that one". when before you merely had to die misserably now you have to go on a medication wild goose chase. your suffering isnt decreased it merely changes a medium. when you consider all interaction between matter as energy transferance between entities vying for the free energy available within a given system what difference does it make if your loosing health to bacteria or loosing money to hospitals or pharmacies or therapists. Now, while im sure alot of sick and dying people will contest this point and say "It's better to be alive" thats not the point I'm arguing. The point I'm trying to clarify is the complete lack of involvement most people have with their treatment. "If my car is broken, i'll go to the mechanic, if my leg is broken I'll go to the hospital. Someone out there knows what to do" Someone out there..
I think that when we purposfully and knowingly diminish personal responsibility over what is done with our information/mind/body/soul we are fully responsible for the outcomes of any potential abuse that might follow. And yet when consequences directly linked to peoples inactions come back to bite them on the ass they are always pointing the finger at someone else. "It's not our fault we cant train our employees, we were attacked by HACKERS!" relinquishing responsiblity for your own defense to some big-brother who will supposedly make it all right seems like such a cheesy way to go. why should people be allowed to reap the benefits of something they cant be personally responsible for? Why should you be allowed to survive if your behavior shows not an inability to evolve and learn but UNWILLINGNESS to do so?
Predators don't care if you cant be bothered to run fast enough.
I wonder how much medicine out there has sexual side effects. How much misnamed soma products are out there. culling and castrating the herd of humans. I wonder if anyone is keeping track of the decision makers who give you a choice but only within limits of what they have chosen for you. Maybe they should be the only ones allowed to breed. Imagine, a castrate nation where you can only be impregnated legally by those approved for evolution.
the ability to find a mate and keep it is no longer the right of passage for breeding. the challange of it has diminished to the point of laughability. practically ANYONE can find someone willing to breed with them.
We have no more predators but we still fear the dark at night, we have no rules against hermitage but fear being 'cast out', we have no real NEED to propogate the species or fight for our young, there are plenty of other humans around to take the next great leap into the future. yet we are still driven by the need for these results. we are still driven by survival oriented GOALS whilst having no survival oriented CHALLANGES.
Humanity needs a new evolutionary proving ground. Merely using "I make more money than you" isn't enough to designate you as a breeder or decision maker. Sceptics of this idea say "But it works" Yeah, it works. it works within the current given system towards what goal? evolution is not something going towards a set goal, its not a peak your climbing. its not a set destination Evolution is the process to improving how you do a certain thing. Once our enviornment dictated how we evolved, now we controll that enviornment. Whats left to dictate how we evolve? society? financial structures? when you consider the fact that a relativly small amount of people have a VERY large influence if not complete controll over the financial and therfore social systems can you honestly say "They are more EVOLVED than me?"
Maybe they are. But if they are are we evolving in the right direction? is learning survival skills within our given system enough? should we try and evolve beyond it?
religion, state, government, they all try to create laws and regulations that require you to function and therfore evolve within a system that THEY DEFINE. You define the laws, you define the system, you define evolution. and while a few shinning stars find ways to overcome those systems they merely create new systems by which followers of their new version of "Freedom" can be enslaved. Example, you use Peer to Peer file sharing networks, your rebeling against the RIAA/MPAA's idea of evolution but conforming to that of those who made those P2P applications. exchanging one system for another in a kind of "stay one step away from the predator"
Our ancestors didnt stay only ONE step away from the predator, they fucking OWNED it, they kicked its ass so completely we wiped them out and now were the top dogs. If all we've got to throw at ourselves evolution-wise is our own evolutionary belly-aching then where the fuck are we going? Why should we be cajoled into evolutionary apathy by the comforts of our current conditions dictated to us by people who are redirecting our afinity for evolution towards their own ends? What other ends should we pursue? spiritual enlightenment? physio-energetical transcendance? Clarity of thought? complete and total wart removal? Our species has been cast adrift, we have outsmarted nature on all its major fronts to the point where we think we've conquered it within because we've tamed it from without. We have tamed the outside of the cave and now were ignoring the nature inside the cave, of which we are part of. we've removed ourselves from to food chain to do what? Prey on each other?
I don't buy it. Its not enuogh. I doesn't cut it for me.
There HAS to be something more.
I WANT A DIFFERENT DIRECTION TO EVOLVE IN!
Introducing "Froods Random Commentary"
Prickle-Prickle, Discord 16, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3170
Reading, Stuff. Whizdumb?
"It's the sides of the mountain which sustain life, not the top. Here's where things grow. But of course, without the top you can't have any sides. It's the top that defines the sides."
- Robert M. Pirsig - "Zen and the art of Motorcycle Maintenance"
Frood Commentary: The top of the mountain has life too, only intensified.
The top of the mountain is subject to the full power of the elements; Sun, Wind, Rain, Snow, Ice, etc. The top of the mountain is life intensified, condensed and pushed to evolve. The top of the mountain is not a goal, It's and apex, like the top of a parabola. It's a state at which everything is at It's most intense, It's an orgasm of circumstance. If you cant maintain the top you go on the slopes with the rest of life that couldnt cut it. The peak is a state, not a place. As any waveform peak it requires you to be able to shift back and forth in a dimention to maintain. Linear movement along a dimention is held precious by "Circle" theorists. Why? Isn't the peak the best part? Are we merely subscribed to the idea of continuity due to our inability to stop or roll back dimentionally? The top does not define the sides just like the top of an arc of pee does not define urinal splashback. the sides are effect of linear movement along a dimention; time, gravity, pick one.Reconsider the meaning of
" S-I-D-E E-F-F-E-C-T ".
- Frood - "My mind went 'Kerplunk'. Now what?"
Third eye winking
It's been a while. It's amazing how easily we fall into routine, how insidiously the meaningless toil of every day life makes time trasnparent. Another day, another week, another year, another lifetime. I find it difficult to remember what I did yesterday much less what I did last week. something in me refuses to believe that if you sit around and complain about time passing without you having done anything usefull with it you aren't responsible for it. Whatever your distractions may be there is still a measure of personal responsiblity regarding how you choose to pass the time untill you die.
So, what is it? What mechanism does the human mind possess to make the days 'fly by'. How does ones brain idle? and why? is it because we are only able to comprehend change? thinking back on wasted days I can usually remember them full well if I try hard enough, so the recording mechanism isnt broken. neither is the interpetation unit or else you'd sit around drooling all day. Why do I, as a human, know that life is to be enjoyed every minute and not just passed by yet my body/brain do the opposite?
I think the problem is insignificance. when your daily events are insignificant they dont register on your brain's scale of change. the larger the change the larger the 'blip' on your mental radar. I'd like to know why this is a qualifier for mental attention, doesn't driving to work every day require attention? doesn't eating/bathing/breathing require attention? why do I not remember performing these tasks?
To anyone who disagrees with me, try remembering the first time you EVER jerked off (easy right?) and then try and remember all the other times and you'll get the idea of what I'm saying.
Qoute - "Life is a gift to be enjoyed every second every minute is temporary not infinite yet I find myself staring at the clock waiting for the day to go by so I ask myself why?" - Mr. Liff
Blah. unworthy rant. naptime.
Frood, You are missed.
Setting Orange, Discord 27, YOLD 3170
Found an amazing guide on how to masturbate in the most unlikely of situations. fun read and informative too! get it here!
> It really works!
Setting Orange, Discord 27, YOLD 3170
Webloitering. Checking out wierd artwork. Check out Damnengine's artwork section. Words alone cannot describe the range of emotions his artwork evokes. For more wierdly beutiful photoshopped art check out the digital artists section on Abnormis
> bah, i wish i could do that sort of work...and also stuff from digitalblasphemy
Prickle-Prickle, Discord 26, YOLD 3170
Duck Taco Project public Entry 1. revision 1, "Ideas, response?"
Talking to KunDa on IRC.. thoughts compile. Interaction with others and bouncing ideas back and forth are always a good proving ground for knowing if you are full of shit or not. I like to equate doing so to sparring in martial arts. Sparring isnt Fighting. Sparring is trying your techniques in a controlled enviornemnt to see if your ideas are correct and if they work. If they do you and your sparring partner can figure out how to make them better and learn form them, if they are complete bullshit then both of you can look at them and go "Hrmm, how do we make this work, whats wrong with this? How can we learn from this mistake" Either way it provides a proving ground for new ideas aswell as old ones. New ideas without a proving grounds are usually just bullshit because like lousy technique they usually dont work. and no amount of chest thumping over how you'r the grand wazoo of this style of martial arts of this school of thought is going to make them any better, it just makes you look like an idiot to those who actually prove their techniques. consquently thats why so many martial arts schools sucks in this day and age, no proving ground, people arent interested in learning or improving, just in falling into the "Monkey See Monkey Do" repetition of someone elses actions as long as they are assured that they are doing something right. falling into rote and pattern without proof or effort to investigate a given truth further is a common problem with any religion/thought/martial arts/work/life. you need a proving ground to see if your just full of shit or not. A good proving ground allows you to move forward, to learn and to evolve.
There, I said it again. Evolution. I TOLD YOU I WOULD!
But thats not what I wanted to talk about. I want to present to the Cabal or congregation or anyone who gives a fuck enough to read this an idea thats been fermenting in my head for a few years. I call it The Duck Taco Project!
The essence of the Duck Taco Project is my attempt to map human psychological behavior patterns to mathematical equation. So far I've been stumbling in the dark being an authority on niether psychology or mathematics. I've come up with a couple of basic theories one of which I will lay down.
Frood's Law of Inverses: The behavior a person exhibits externally is directly inverse to the way they subconciously precieves themselves internally. The magnitude to which the internal and external are in constrast with each other is directly related to how full of shit the person is.
I use the term 'Full of shit' in a manner descriptive of how introspective a person is, how far away they are from realizing their own mental state and how honest with themselves they are about their problems and insecurities. An introspective person should be able to examine his behavior while he is exhibiting it. Something akin to having a voice in the back of your head that asks you WHY you are acting in a particular way in a given situation instead of just going on 'autopilot' and not questioning your own motives. I guess the term full of shit means that you are afraid of your insecurities to the point where you are either unable to unwilling to aknowledge or confront them. By not being able to aknowledge/confront your issues you are very likely to get pulled down by negative behavior caused by them without knowing why you are acting in such a manner. In any case, there are levels of 'Full of shitness' which vary from person to person.
Example: People who are bullies or are trying to be excessivly macho are usually covering up for homosexual tendancies or are simply mentally scared little children. Gurls who go out and party and sleep around are usually just sad and looking for attention and love etc. The more your afraid of your inner demons the more your outward behavior will try to compensate. If on the other hand you conquer your inner demons or gain a better understanding of WHY you behave in a certain manner your behavior should be less of a knee jerk reaction to circumstance. According to the law one who is enlightened or at least content is one who's interrior is in harmony with their exterior.
Feel free to refute my law. I require more info to continue the project. any feedback is welcome.
The name comes from a Space Ghost Coast to Coast episode where he has various famous chefs on his show. One of them prepares some duck meat and Space Ghost asks him to put the duck meat in a taco. No real reason for choosing the name other than the fact I thought it was cool.
P.S I thought about the Duck Taco Project BEFORE I read Isaac Asimov's "The second Foundation" ISBN - 0553293362
> 1) Duck Taco Project??? :P > 2) so far I find no problems with it. (im no authority either just another stumbler in the dark) > I think though that for clarity and information free of 'static' (very difficult to create) you could swap up the > ambiguous words like 'retarded' and 'full of shit' for more clear definitions. Since these words have > multiple meanings to different folk. This is just the purist part of my brain influenced by RobertAntonWilson > who was influenced by Alfred Korzibsky ("Science and Sanity" ISBN 0937298018) > the fellow who explains that our language is archaic and limits our thoughts and expressions due > it obsolete logic refuted long ago (aristotalian logic). > Reading back..my input isn't so constructive. Just feedback > I guess, no additions at the moment. I like where you are going. -KunDa
Pungenday, Discord 25, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3170
"Things to do when you are inspired by your significant other"
I recently found and fondled a gurl of which I am fond. She inspires me to do things which I normally would not do. I will describe the inpirational process in the form of a story.
We were out of condoms. Being out of condoms is akin to being on the titanic and being out of life preserves as the ship is going down. You REALLY want to get off but doing so without one just might kill you. Anyway, we sallied forth to the nearest EVERYTHING-YOU-COULD-POSSIBLY-WANT-24-7-EXCEPT-ON-XMAS-DAY "Super Markets" and consulted their wall of prophylactic majesty. The veriety wasn't astounding but wasn't too shabby either. your basic veriety condoms some with some exciting feature or other such as ultra-thin or ribbed or extra-lubricated etc. Considering that most of these puppies differ in a miniscule amount of lubricant or "RIBS" that are a micron thick and are not felt by females I figured this was just another shameless marketing ploy by people who, while helping me by keeping me alive after having sex, are still commiting some kind of spiritual murder by playing on my insecurities about being able to please women. After consulting my gurl on the matter she said that she knew of no discernable difference between the brands. I suspect that, as any sex related questions I pose to her, she lied to shelter my fragile ego. (An ego so fragile in fact that it prevents me from mentioning her much in this story while glorifying me and my actions, Ahh.. the joys of being a self-involved asshole).
A quick reference to the location of this wonderwall. it is located at a right angle to the line of cash registers and is only partially hidden behind the rest of the pharmapseudocals so when your out there buying penis armor everyone waiting in line can look at your with scorn and maybe slight interest. It seems like the spot in which, if we were a society driven more by smell than by visual input, multiple curiously obtrusive yet friendly crotch sniffings would ensue. But I digress.
Mysteriously there was one of those Blood pressue measuring machines right next to it and unlike the other toys scattered about the entrance of the Ubermarket this one did not require money to tourture your children in. Never one to pass up a free ride I rolled up my sleeve, making sure to raise my arm so as to smell my own pungent armpits thus affirming my manhood, and inserted it into the circular portal of truth. I fancied briefly that my test would require me to cut my arteries/veins open and hook them up to something akin to those "Test your strength" contraptions at carnivals but alas, this hope was shattered when the airbag inside the ring of destiny encircling my arm merely inflated and then slowly deflated supposedly taking measurements and requiring me to "SIT STILL WHILE TESTING!". after the bag had deflated completely I was treated to the results which defined the future of my health insurance above an indicative chart describing the suggested rates for Systolic and Diastolic Pressures.
|| Rating || Systolic || Diastolic || || Optimal || <120 || <80 || || Normal || <130 || <85 || || High ||130-139|| 85-89 || || Bad ||140-159|| 90-99 || ||Really Bad||160-179||100-109|| ||You Are Fucked||>179|| >109 || ||Your Rating|| 79 || 52 ||
||Heart Rate|| 62 ||
I can only assume that this is good since I've got no earthly idea what those numbers mean. but as demonstrated by the chart above the farther away I was from the "You are fucked" category the better. I guess less IS more. However my trust in the supermarket blood pressure indicator has been shattered ever since it gave me a rating of 180 over 50 on another occasion when I was deathly I'll and shopping for tuppaware to install a P-133 in to build a Linux Router (an escapade which ended in me choosing a portable plastic filing cabinet for the machine and considering catboxes for rackmounted solutions. more on that later. Maybe) I speculate that it is operated by a small midget lurking in its depths who is in the pay of some pharmapseudocal conglomorate or other, But thats merely speculation.
My gurl scored 130 over 90 with a heart rate of 93. I think she's trying to imply that I should get her pregnant so she can carry more weight around and get some excercise. Then again most of my theories on women are wrong and in fact by the time anyone reads this I will most likely be without a woman again (sooner if she reads this). Again, I digress.
After staring at the wall and discussing the different brands of condoms and their various magical properties I lamented the fact that I could not find any condoms in different colors. My gurl took about 2 seconds to find the pack the location of which my feeble mind could not encompass under such strenous conditions and brought it forth. I looked at her seemingly effortless ability to solve this, as well as many other of lifes great mysteries, with my usual expression of stooped wonder mixed with emberassed incompetance. I considered the package, with its multi colored front with glee and joy at the possibilities of wearing something colorful that is going to a place where, Hopefully, no one can discern color.
"Nice, condoms in all the colors of the rainbow. I wonder if they have a rainbow colored one, then I could say 'Wanna know where the rainbow ends? Here Biatch!' maybe I should check for a leprecon behind my nutsack. Who knows, if I stick this thing in you I might find a pot of gold" or words to that effect. (Trying to make my gurl laugh, I forget what she said if anything. more self involved basterdom on my part).
anyways, after quickly converting the price of the box of condoms and the number of condoms in it to a "$ per fuck" ratio I concluded that it was a small price to pay for the novelty of colored condoms and proceeded to the checkout line, pausing only briefly to grab a pack of gummy bears (Mmmmm.. gummylicious). I joked with my gurl that I would harass the kid working the register by waiting for him to pick up the condoms and then use my gayest accent to ask him what his favorite color is but unfortunately I chickened out and merely payed for the gummies/condoms with only a slight emberassment at his salty toned "Have a good night".
Opon arrival at my abode we opened the box of condoms and inspected their contents. the condoms are wrapped in indevidual square packages which are fluerescent green on one side and transparent on the other, so you can choose your favorite color I guess. after pondering what to do with them for a while (except the obvious) and making numerous Henry Rollins Quotes of "Considering where this thing is going, Who gives a fuck about the color." and chewing on gummy bears I was hit by sudden inspiration. I suggested my idea to my gurl and she laughed and told me she'd help me. I went upstairs and got a reel of selotape and a box of clingfilm normally used to supress the spattering of chicken explosion related juices in my microwave and proceeded to meld the gummies and the condom wrappers, being careful ot match the colors. the result was quite amusing and sucessful. I think everyone should do this.
the process of making these babies involves 2 (or 3 if your planning a 2 gurl 1 guy threesome or are just gummy) placed on a length of clingfilm in some kind of sexual position and then sealed by wrapping the clingfilm around them a couple of times (not too many times so you can still see them) then placed on the transparent side of the condom wrapper so the colors match up and then wrapped a couple more times to secure the gummies to the condom packaging. the only backdraws of this method is that the gummy colors and the condom colors dont always match and that when your in a hurry to get to the condom taking off the clingwrap/gummies can be frustrating.
<insert windows Tada.wav here> You now have something far superior to merely a condom with gummies in it, you have something that will make your sexual experience completely different by its cuteness factor alone, not to mention all the combinations of gummies/condoms you can imagine. This Idea might spark the development of an entire market of products which are accompanied by gummy bears, gummybears inside CPU boxes, gummybears inside ammo boxes, gummybears send to mars etc.. Maybe I should patent this and cash in on it while the fad lasts, which might be a while since everyone (with the exception of the demented and maybe diabetic) love gummy bears.
It was the best idea I had had in months. the mere presence of this gurl inspired me to great lengths of humor and ingenuity. Now if only she can inspire me to pull my head out of my ass and write a story which is less about me and more about her. I hope she will but who knows.
[#gregorian_erisian_converter] Quick Link
Gregorian-to-Erisian Date Converter --> http://jubal.westnet.com/hyperdiscordia/dateconvert.html
[#LizardFury] Pungenday, Discord 25, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3170
Sounds from the Cave of Lizards
Due to my recent adventures into incoherant rambling on KunDa's slice of wiki I've decided it would be more polite if I were to pollute a space hither to unbothered by text. Namely, Mine. Who will read it I do not know. mounds of useless text are sure to ensue as I attempt to populate this corner of the web and whilst those of you who are steady of hand and strong of heart might endevoure to read all of them I will provide this next bulleted list for those of you who want a quick synopsis of what I'll be webloitering about.
The structure of ramblings follows:
- 1.) Pick some generic topic completely unrelated to whats bugging me
- 2.) Post some generic comments about said topic
- 3.) Detiriorate into some vaugly related rethoric concept pertaining to said topic in the most tenous of manners
- 4.) Disregard topic alltogether and babble about evolution
- 5.) Come to no real conclusion on the matter but leave people with a distinct feeling of "WTF?" if they bother reading it.
So there you have it, You have been warned. If you dont believe me look at this rant.
Elitist nihilistic angst ridden theories on everything ensue..