Hagbard Celine is a fictional character from the Illuminatus! Trilogy, a discordian, anarchist and modern-day Leonard da Vinci.
He fights the Illuminati from a golden submarine, the Lief Erickson, (designed and built by himself) which despite its size (the equivalent of five city blocks long) has so far remained undetected.
He uses his computer (again designed by himself, and called FUCKUP
His manifesto is called "Never Whistle While You're Pissing" and in it you can find his Definitions and Distinctions.
The german hacker Karl Koch also used the nickname Hagbard Celine.
Never Whistle While You're Pissing by Hagbard Celine[edit]
From the Illuminatus! Trilogy
Seventh Trip, or Netzach (the SNAFU principle)
"The most thoroughly and relentlessly Damned, banned, excluded, condemned, forbidden, ostracized, ignore, suppressed, repressed, robbed, brutalized and defamed of all Damned Things is the individual human being. The social engineers, statistician, psychologist, sociologists, market researchers, landlords, bureaucrats, captains of industry, bankers, governors, commissars, kings and presidents are perpetually forcing this Damned Thing into carefully prepared blueprints and perpetually irritated that the Damned Thing will not fit into the slot assigned it. The theologians call it a sinner and try to reform it. The governor calls it a criminal and tries to punish it. the psychologist calls it a neurotic and tries to cure it. Still, the Damned Thing will not fit into their slots."
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And Joe remembered from the little book by Hagbard Celine, Never Whistle While You're Pissing (privately printed, and distributed only to members of the JAMs and the Legion of Dynamic Discord):
"The individual act of obedience is the cornerstone not only of the strength of authoritarian society but also of its weakness."